Aging in Place Design
I recently helped my 81 year old Mom move from her large 4-BR house in Southern California to a comfy 2-BR condo near our family in Northern California, designed to better fit this stage of her life. It has been a TON of work! But I am so grateful to have this opportunity to use my passion for interior design to improve the lives of the people I love.
I feel so lucky to have been the one to manage this move! I’m full of gratitude and sore muscles. I went through every single thing she owns, every piece of clothing, piece of paper and item of nostalgia. And it tugged at my heartstrings. This process was more emotional for me than I expected. I’ve remembered and learned a lot about my Mom, and my late Father, these past few months. They had such full lives, accomplished so much, and helped so many people. I found countless examples of this and other treasures in the mounds of letters and memorabilia that my mom saved.
I’m thrilled with how well this came together, and most importantly, Mom is too. She is still living independently but in a safe and manageable home only five minutes away from my house, and ten minutes from my sister and two of her seven grandchildren.
First, downsizing is a TON of work and it is really something to think about doing sooner than you think. Downsizing and moving requires organizing, purging, selling furniture, donating, recycling, making improvements, selling one home, buying another, space-planning the new home, potentially remodeling/updating the new home, moving in, and finally, decorating the new space so that you are happy and comfortable from day one. And this will ideally need to happen over a few short months. Whew! Do you have it in you?
Many people would prefer to stay in their homes for as long as possible to avoid all of this! But even then, home modifications will likely still need to happen to ensure those we love will stay safe as they age.
Making safety updates as we age, especially to our bathrooms, is crucial to preventing slips and falls. These safeguards can apply to anyone who is going through a hard time in their life, whether they are recovering from surgery, illness, or general weakness.
My Mom’s 1955 condo still had the original bathroom when we bought the unit, so not only did it don the ever-so-popular Pepto Bismol pink tile found in about 20% of American households built from 1946-1966, but it also presented SEVERAL HAZARDS:
1. A low, free-standing bathtub
2. A walk-in shower with a high shower curb
3. Zero grab bars
People with balance issues or weak muscles should not use a bathtub. Stepping into a tub can be difficult and a freestanding tub is a trip-hazard. Instead, a curb-less walk-in shower with a hand-shower wand and a fold-down bench is ideal.
Grab bars around the shower and toilet are a must-have. Talk to your loved one about whether they prefer to pull up with vertical or horizontal grab bars, and figure out the ideal height to install them before making assumptions. Choose non-slip floor tile, especially in the shower; and consider avoiding decorative rugs as they can be a trip-hazard.
Mom enjoyed a relaxing two-week vacation visiting family on the East Coast at the end of February while I moved her belongings from the SoCal house to the NorCal condo. She had very little idea what the condo was going to look like since she let me manage the whole process of remodeling the bathroom, making upgrades to the kitchen, and deciding what would be going with her to the new home. “I trust you completely, Laura,” she said multiple times throughout these last few months. She put her complete trust in me to make it happen, and make it beautiful.
That said, she was very anxious on the flight back from the East Coast and had a look of TERROR in her eyes as she arrived and started walking towards the condo! But as soon as she walked through the front door a sense of relief immediately washed over her. She saw her furniture, her art hanging on the walls, a cozy fire in the fireplace, and red roses, her favorite, on the dining room table. I could see the stress just melt away: her shoulders instantly relaxed, she smiled and was visibly happy. One of the first things she said was “Wow, it already feels like home.”
Her new home was both familiar and new. One of the highlights was, of course, the newly remodeled bathroom with its heated floors, improved lighting, an insanely organized beauty supply closet, the curb-less shower with fold-down seat, toilet with bidet, and many visibly appealing grab bars. Yes, there is actually such a thing as an attractive grab bar!
I’m thrilled with how well this came together, and most importantly, Mom is too. She is still living independently but in a safe and manageable home only five minutes away from my house, and ten minutes from my sister and two of her seven grandchildren.
The Southern California chapter of our lives is officially over. Now it’s the beginning of a whole new one and we are looking forward to our time together in Berkeley! Upwards and onwards... ❤️💪